*** Guide To A Better Life ***

Face it, you have to go outside eventually. Sure, Amazon.com will deliver right to your door and now even the local pizza shop does deliveries, but, mark my words: some day you're going to HAVE to push away from the computer and go... OUTSIDE. Here's a guide:

1. Wear Pants - Countless attempts to better oneself have been cut tragically short by leaving the house without proper attire.

2. Use Your Real Name - Sorry, but nobody will be impressed if you go by the name "2HOT4U", "Monarch" or "SATAN666." Names like "Bengt" or "Svante" are just fine.

3. The Telephone is Your Friend - Hear that ringing sound? Pick up the phone. Now speak into it.

4. If Your Car Crashes, You Cannot Simply Reboot It.

5. Do Not Be Surprised That Nobody Looks Like Jennifer Lopez.